Ain’t nothin’ worse than some paper-munchin’ pests turnin’ your prized books into an all-you-can-eat buffet! You lettin’ these little silver-skinned freeloaders eat up your records, your birth certificates, your hard-earned literature? Keep yo’ books dry, keep ‘em sealed, and if you see one of these critters, you best believe there’s more!

If you see one of them slinky, silver-scaled critters creepin’ through yo’ house, best believe he ain’t alone! Silverfish ain’t just here to eat yo’ books and glue—they lettin’ you know somethin’ big and nasty might be comin’ next. You better dry out that house and clean up quick, or you gonna be runnin’ a…

Now see here—y’all out here pickin’ up dusty ol’ furniture from who-knows-where, draggin’ it in like it ain’t got a past! Them silverfish been feastin’ on books and fabric like a buffet, just waitin’ to set up shop in yo’ house. If you don’t check that junk proper, you might as well be handin’ ‘em…

Now listen here, ain’t nothin’ nastier than some creepy lil’ fish-bugs layin’ eggs in yo’ books, yo’ clothes, and yo’ pantry like they payin’ rent! If you don’t vacuum ‘em up, dry out yo’ house, and put down some boric acid, you might as well start chargin’ ‘em rent ‘cause they settin’ up shop for…

Now let me tell y’all somethin’—sprayin’ a little lavender oil around ain’t gonna stop them slick, sneaky silver-skinned bugs from chewin’ up yo’ books and drapes! You need to get real, get rid of that moisture, and stop hopin’ some hippie oils gonna save you from a full-blown infestation!